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D&D for Fun & Profit 2!
May. 20th, 2013 08:15 amSo after the Living Cemetery, we do more exploring and find yet another lab room with three Litchs in front of three tables, all with alchemy equipment. By now Amess, my Feline Hero of Justice!, is completely and utterly FED UP WITH IT ALL.
Me: Watch out for the tables, boys.
We burst in thanks to Whack-a-Mole's Paladanic Hammer of DOOOOOMMMMM and attack. I'm still in Stone Skin and Flying, so I shoot one of the tables with Fire Arrow.
DM: Congratulations, the table's on fire.
Me: What? It didn't explode?
DM: Nope. Just burning.
Me: Well, phooey.
Multi-Pass sends a rolling fireball in that hits all three Litches and incinerates one of the intact tables.
Me: WHAT? How come his incinerated?
DM: He hit it with forty points of damage.
Me: GRRRRRRR
Whack a Mole and Bard Boy take some serious hits before the Litchs are cleared out. After a few quick healing spells on the rogue, WAM and Bard Boy, Multi-Pass went scouting and found a flight of stairs down. We agreed this would be the best way to go, so we all teleported to the stairwell and followed them.
DM: As you go down the stairs, you feel a great sense of unease.
Me: My ears are flat, my tail is bristled and I'm still sneezing from the grave dust.
DM: When you reach the bottom of the stairs, you're in a 40x40 room. There's three Litchs at the other end, the one in the middle is cloaked.
Bard-Boy: Bardic Knowledge check! 35 says I know everything.
DM: The one in the middle is the first necromancer. Ever. He's 10,000 years old. He asks what you young ones are doing in his laboratory and why you're making such a mess.
Bard-Boy: Okay! I'm using Glibness! Hey there, man! We didn't know it was your lab. We're just here to find something.
Me: *hissing* Apologize!
Bard-Boy: What?
Me: *hissing* Apologize!
Multi-Pass: We don't apologize!
Bard-Boy continues to flail about trying to Dominate Person (failing utterly) and essentially threatens the Necromancer to turn over the Heart of Magic or else. Amess the Feline Hero of Justice is starting to freak out. Multi-Pass casts Phantom Thief and starts stealing whatever it can.
DM: There's nothing on any of the Litchs and the table is full of scrolls.
Multi-Pass: Fine. I take all their scrolls.
Me: *pushing Bard Boy aside* Please forgive our bard, he tends to get a little carried away. We're very sorry about the damage to your lab, we are trying to find something.
Necromancer: Who sent you, young one?
Me: I don't know! I landed with this group completely by accident, I'm the only good person here!
Bard-Boy: Listen, dude, just tell us what we need to know so we don't have to kill you. And by the way, nobody knows this is your lab. You really can't expect people NOT to come here when nobody KNOWS where you are and what you're doing, savvy?
Me: Meep! *slides away from Bard-Boy*
DM: You're trying to die, aren't you?
Bard-Boy: How many Litchs are there anyway?
DM: Three! The one in the middle is a Litch.
Bard-Boy: Why didn't you SAY SO? I wouldn't have tried Dominate if I knew he was undead!
DM: He's a level 40 necromancer! I thought you KNEW D&D necromancer rules!
Me: Oh gods, we're gonna die.
The Necromancer steps forward and blasts us with Panic. The entire party turns and flees upstairs, runs until the hallway ends and cower until 40 rounds are up.
Multi-Pass: What was this guy's name again?
DM: Rilius.
Multi-Pass: *writing* He's on my kill list. Cat-girl apologized. We don't do that. No witnesses.
Me: I am NOT going back down there! *fiddles with ring*
Bard-Boy: I'm going back down there. I'm singing as I go so I can Charm his ass.
DM: When you walk in you're hit with Destroy. The only part of you that's still in the room is your equipment.
Bard-Boy: DAMNIT!
Multi-Pass: Tell me what you want to keep and I'll use a level 5 spell to bring it back to the party. We're hanging out on the stairs.
Multi-Pass uses two spells to bring all the equipment over. By this point Amess has pulled together her courage and rejoined them.
Me: Oh my gods, what happened?!?
Multi-Pass: This is all that's left of Red Wizard Needs Food (Bard-Boy's title)
Amess sits down and starts crying. Whack-A-Mole goes next.
WAM: Hi!
Necromancer: Are you here to challenge me too? I just killed your bard.
WAM: Yeah, no biggie. Now we don't have to pay him this week. Listen, we're really just here to get something.
NM: What?
WAM: The Heart of Magic.
NM: Do you know what it does?
WAM: Nope!
NM: Then why are you looking for it?
WAM: Because we were asked to.
NM: By whom?
WAM: I don't remember.
NM: The Heart of Magic is a very powerful item and you don't know who sent you or why they need it?
WAM: I just follow orders and kill things.
Multi-Pass: *from the stairwell* It was Miranda G (I don't remember the last name)
WAM: Oh yeah! Her.
NM: Ah. I know Miranda, she's a friend, so I can help you.
WAM: Sweet! Can you give it to us?
NM: No. The Heart of Magic is not here. We have the key.
WAM: Sweet! Can we have it?
NM: We can fetch it for you.
WAM: Sweet! Can you go get it now?
By this time Bard-Boy's ghost is lamenting its fate and wailing about how the Barbarian Paladin is doing better then him and announces he's totally haunting that Necromancer. SNB is also researching a level 15 cleric so he can come back as a Favored Soul and kick serious undead ass.
DM: Well, that's all I've got, guys. I was expecting another fight upstairs for experience and loot, but you teleported to the stairs, so the Big Boss Battle is going to have to wait. You're all doomed.
The rest of the party is not going to be happy with Ames.
Me: Watch out for the tables, boys.
We burst in thanks to Whack-a-Mole's Paladanic Hammer of DOOOOOMMMMM and attack. I'm still in Stone Skin and Flying, so I shoot one of the tables with Fire Arrow.
DM: Congratulations, the table's on fire.
Me: What? It didn't explode?
DM: Nope. Just burning.
Me: Well, phooey.
Multi-Pass sends a rolling fireball in that hits all three Litches and incinerates one of the intact tables.
Me: WHAT? How come his incinerated?
DM: He hit it with forty points of damage.
Me: GRRRRRRR
Whack a Mole and Bard Boy take some serious hits before the Litchs are cleared out. After a few quick healing spells on the rogue, WAM and Bard Boy, Multi-Pass went scouting and found a flight of stairs down. We agreed this would be the best way to go, so we all teleported to the stairwell and followed them.
DM: As you go down the stairs, you feel a great sense of unease.
Me: My ears are flat, my tail is bristled and I'm still sneezing from the grave dust.
DM: When you reach the bottom of the stairs, you're in a 40x40 room. There's three Litchs at the other end, the one in the middle is cloaked.
Bard-Boy: Bardic Knowledge check! 35 says I know everything.
DM: The one in the middle is the first necromancer. Ever. He's 10,000 years old. He asks what you young ones are doing in his laboratory and why you're making such a mess.
Bard-Boy: Okay! I'm using Glibness! Hey there, man! We didn't know it was your lab. We're just here to find something.
Me: *hissing* Apologize!
Bard-Boy: What?
Me: *hissing* Apologize!
Multi-Pass: We don't apologize!
Bard-Boy continues to flail about trying to Dominate Person (failing utterly) and essentially threatens the Necromancer to turn over the Heart of Magic or else. Amess the Feline Hero of Justice is starting to freak out. Multi-Pass casts Phantom Thief and starts stealing whatever it can.
DM: There's nothing on any of the Litchs and the table is full of scrolls.
Multi-Pass: Fine. I take all their scrolls.
Me: *pushing Bard Boy aside* Please forgive our bard, he tends to get a little carried away. We're very sorry about the damage to your lab, we are trying to find something.
Necromancer: Who sent you, young one?
Me: I don't know! I landed with this group completely by accident, I'm the only good person here!
Bard-Boy: Listen, dude, just tell us what we need to know so we don't have to kill you. And by the way, nobody knows this is your lab. You really can't expect people NOT to come here when nobody KNOWS where you are and what you're doing, savvy?
Me: Meep! *slides away from Bard-Boy*
DM: You're trying to die, aren't you?
Bard-Boy: How many Litchs are there anyway?
DM: Three! The one in the middle is a Litch.
Bard-Boy: Why didn't you SAY SO? I wouldn't have tried Dominate if I knew he was undead!
DM: He's a level 40 necromancer! I thought you KNEW D&D necromancer rules!
Me: Oh gods, we're gonna die.
The Necromancer steps forward and blasts us with Panic. The entire party turns and flees upstairs, runs until the hallway ends and cower until 40 rounds are up.
Multi-Pass: What was this guy's name again?
DM: Rilius.
Multi-Pass: *writing* He's on my kill list. Cat-girl apologized. We don't do that. No witnesses.
Me: I am NOT going back down there! *fiddles with ring*
Bard-Boy: I'm going back down there. I'm singing as I go so I can Charm his ass.
DM: When you walk in you're hit with Destroy. The only part of you that's still in the room is your equipment.
Bard-Boy: DAMNIT!
Multi-Pass: Tell me what you want to keep and I'll use a level 5 spell to bring it back to the party. We're hanging out on the stairs.
Multi-Pass uses two spells to bring all the equipment over. By this point Amess has pulled together her courage and rejoined them.
Me: Oh my gods, what happened?!?
Multi-Pass: This is all that's left of Red Wizard Needs Food (Bard-Boy's title)
Amess sits down and starts crying. Whack-A-Mole goes next.
WAM: Hi!
Necromancer: Are you here to challenge me too? I just killed your bard.
WAM: Yeah, no biggie. Now we don't have to pay him this week. Listen, we're really just here to get something.
NM: What?
WAM: The Heart of Magic.
NM: Do you know what it does?
WAM: Nope!
NM: Then why are you looking for it?
WAM: Because we were asked to.
NM: By whom?
WAM: I don't remember.
NM: The Heart of Magic is a very powerful item and you don't know who sent you or why they need it?
WAM: I just follow orders and kill things.
Multi-Pass: *from the stairwell* It was Miranda G (I don't remember the last name)
WAM: Oh yeah! Her.
NM: Ah. I know Miranda, she's a friend, so I can help you.
WAM: Sweet! Can you give it to us?
NM: No. The Heart of Magic is not here. We have the key.
WAM: Sweet! Can we have it?
NM: We can fetch it for you.
WAM: Sweet! Can you go get it now?
By this time Bard-Boy's ghost is lamenting its fate and wailing about how the Barbarian Paladin is doing better then him and announces he's totally haunting that Necromancer. SNB is also researching a level 15 cleric so he can come back as a Favored Soul and kick serious undead ass.
DM: Well, that's all I've got, guys. I was expecting another fight upstairs for experience and loot, but you teleported to the stairs, so the Big Boss Battle is going to have to wait. You're all doomed.
The rest of the party is not going to be happy with Ames.
