And if anyone gets THAT reference, I'll be very surprised.
SLB kind of threw down a challenge against my Front Flower Bed Plan, namely, that he didn't expect me to work on it consistently or even more then once a day. I, being a stubborn Witch, decided to Prove Him Wrong.
For the last two days, I've been clearing out the bed. Yesterday was about 20 minutes of general weeding. Today was 15 minutes of shoveling free wood chips into buckets, buying begonia bulbs and about 20 minutes trying to dig out a sapling. I succeeded in digging out the large paving-like stone next to the base, but eventually conceded the ground is really still too hard to properly dig something out, especially with my half assed tools (read: hand trowels and emergency trench shovel). I also managed to break the climbing rose trellis, which was understandably on its last legs to begin with and not properly seated in the ground, par for the course.
My legs and bum have been sore, so I decided after Cuteness came home I would Be Spontaneous and take a hot bath. At 4 in the afternoon. With rose scented fizzies from Japan, as they make the best bath fizzies EVAR.
So I did. With bright afternoon sunlight and classical music playing, I felt like a Lady. A Lady who could then plan a garden party and spend tomorrow puttering around in her richly established rose garden and possibly getting a head start on that herb bed, all dressed in cool, comfy cotton and protected with flowery gear. There would be crystal hanging around to sparkle, lace and wispy fabrics to float in a breeze, and no children to worry about.
Then I remembered I'm a single mom with two kids, it's April so there's not much else I can DO in the garden except keep clearing out the dead and the waste, and there will be no garden parties. My bathroom is not sparkling white with crystal accents. I don't run around in Empire waist dresses and sip juleps in the conservatory. I do not have a cutting garden and my attempts at herb pots have failed in a variety of spectacular ways. Methinks it's the terra cotta pots, which, I discovered while reading a garden book from one of my coworkers, are regular evaporators and should be soaked for hours before being planted in. Oh, and parsley is a freaking SPONGE.
Needless to say, I crashed pretty hard. I'm still fighting the disappointment that my idealized Ladyhood comes in small snatches of time and experience and doesn't carry over. I shoveled wood chips and weeded in a grey hoodie I've commandeered from IDK. My jeans are now a muddy mess and I tracked mud into the house which I shall have to go clean up sometime soon or SLB will have a fit when he comes home tonight or gets up in the morning. He has Strong Opinions about Messes.
I found myself thinking of Princess Diana and what a Lady she was, in every sense of the word, and wondering if she would be a good example to research. Then I thought about doing one of those Middle Class to Ladyhood stories, where a sudden inheritance means packing up and going off to live a New Life, like Wistfull only with more luxury. These thoughts actually made the disappointment WORSE, because all I can do is make it up and live vicariously through a story, a story that is terribly trite. How pathetic is that?!
Now I sit in my English Garden bedroom, smelling ever so faintly of roses and Japanese cherry blossoms and fight Indigo trying to surge in and take the wheel because she found a weakness. I know I can be a Lady without being wealthy. I don't NEED all the trappings, just the right frame of mind, a good wardrobe (with the thrift & consignment stores in town, this is easy and cheap!), my chin up, my smile on and the willingness to live in the moment and enjoy it.
Doesn't mean I don't WANT them. Or at least a good full sized shovel. In the meantime, I'm going to look up the feasibility of burning a stump to death and badger IDK into doing dishes so we can have leftover pasta for dinner.
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