I think all of us are looking forward to meeting him. He's a gamer and most of us are gamers. I'm also hoping that this does not feel like a 48 hour job interview from hell for him.
I agree with much of what T. said about autonomy. She and I are coming from different perspectives probably across gender lines.
The Spangly Elephant...One of my friends asked a few of her friends "What do you do with a premature 'I love you.'" This was interesting reading, since the person in question had been married before.
I think it's sweet. I also think he does not know you that well yet. This could be "OMG she's nifty, and cute, and gets me, and I did not think I would find a woman like this..." I think you mentioned he does not have a lot of relationship experience.
He's also living in a geeky person desert also. I'm hoping that and some insecurity is what is leading to the jealousy. In my case it was "Why would she want to be with me? Therefore I need to be on guard against these other guys." Pretty standard failure mode, been there done that, lost the GF over it.
My gut feeling about some of the things he has done and said that you have written about make me think he's got some self-esteem issues. I could/have done some of them back in the day.
The other side of this is not as innocent. This is something I am very careful about personally. You have resources, and you are a kind giving person. You could be a good target for someone manipulative.
One of the conversations I have had with a couple friends of mine is that people sometimes give "Too much, too early." They want people to like them. So something to consider there also.
"Life, Relationships and What Do I Want?" I keep hearing your plans, but what does he want in 5-10 years?
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timeasmymeasure
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Date: 2013-02-01 01:23 pm (UTC)I agree with much of what T. said about autonomy. She and I are coming from different perspectives probably across gender lines.
The Spangly Elephant...One of my friends asked a few of her friends "What do you do with a premature 'I love you.'" This was interesting reading, since the person in question had been married before.
I think it's sweet. I also think he does not know you that well yet. This could be "OMG she's nifty, and cute, and gets me, and I did not think I would find a woman like this..." I think you mentioned he does not have a lot of relationship experience.
He's also living in a geeky person desert also. I'm hoping that and some insecurity is what is leading to the jealousy. In my case it was "Why would she want to be with me? Therefore I need to be on guard against these other guys." Pretty standard failure mode, been there done that, lost the GF over it.
My gut feeling about some of the things he has done and said that you have written about make me think he's got some self-esteem issues. I could/have done some of them back in the day.
The other side of this is not as innocent. This is something I am very careful about personally. You have resources, and you are a kind giving person. You could be a good target for someone manipulative.
One of the conversations I have had with a couple friends of mine is that people sometimes give "Too much, too early." They want people to like them. So something to consider there also.
"Life, Relationships and What Do I Want?" I keep hearing your plans, but what does he want in 5-10 years?