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When did my son become a 5 year old girl?
Jul. 30th, 2011 09:21 pmI try very hard to maintain gender neutrality with my children. I don't always succeed. Tonight was an interesting observation.
IDK is 11, going on 12. Puberty is looming and I'm not looking forward to it, but I will take it as it comes. He asked for a facial cleanser several weeks ago and I bought him a jar of Noxema, which was my preferred cleanser in high school. Not only did it work on zits, it was an excellent sunburn treatment.
Naturally, he hasn't been using it and today I noticed how pimply his nose was becoming. So I told him I'd show "How to Properly Clean One's Face".
It was, frankly, a drama scene. He wouldn't splash his face with water, he dabbed wet fingertips against his skin. I showed him how to splash his face properly and it still took several times. When applying the cleanser, he dabbed instead of actually rubbing it on his face and missed whole sections of cheek and chin until I stepped in and showed him where he missed. Rinsing off his face left the floor and my jeans soaking wet and only about half the cleanser actually removed. He also bemoaned a sore jaw from a tumble off his bike about 4 days ago EVERY time I touched his chin.
I kept telling him "You can't be dainty with this. You have to get in and get it done. Don't dab, splash. Rub it in, don't dot your face like you're putting on makeup. You're not a five year old girl."
"You're taunting me." Was his response. Naturally, I refuted that and told him I was simply trying to help him get a job done.
But it worries me a little. I realize he's a gentle child, except when his temper gets the better of him and then he tends toward minor self-vandalism (tearing up paper and breaking toys). But his reluctance to get his face wet, even in the shower, and his general half-hearted attempts at personal hygiene bother me. I've accepted the fact he can't keep his room clean or his clothes picked up. I don't accept him wearing the same socks for a week, or the clothes he slept in again the next day. So why is it that EVERY BLOODY DAY I have to tell him "Put on clean socks"? Why is it that he'll spend an hour in the shower, but not wash his hair? WHY is he being so, well, dainty over a simple procedure?
How much of this is just normal boy behavior? (She asks her mostly child-less friend list)
IDK is 11, going on 12. Puberty is looming and I'm not looking forward to it, but I will take it as it comes. He asked for a facial cleanser several weeks ago and I bought him a jar of Noxema, which was my preferred cleanser in high school. Not only did it work on zits, it was an excellent sunburn treatment.
Naturally, he hasn't been using it and today I noticed how pimply his nose was becoming. So I told him I'd show "How to Properly Clean One's Face".
It was, frankly, a drama scene. He wouldn't splash his face with water, he dabbed wet fingertips against his skin. I showed him how to splash his face properly and it still took several times. When applying the cleanser, he dabbed instead of actually rubbing it on his face and missed whole sections of cheek and chin until I stepped in and showed him where he missed. Rinsing off his face left the floor and my jeans soaking wet and only about half the cleanser actually removed. He also bemoaned a sore jaw from a tumble off his bike about 4 days ago EVERY time I touched his chin.
I kept telling him "You can't be dainty with this. You have to get in and get it done. Don't dab, splash. Rub it in, don't dot your face like you're putting on makeup. You're not a five year old girl."
"You're taunting me." Was his response. Naturally, I refuted that and told him I was simply trying to help him get a job done.
But it worries me a little. I realize he's a gentle child, except when his temper gets the better of him and then he tends toward minor self-vandalism (tearing up paper and breaking toys). But his reluctance to get his face wet, even in the shower, and his general half-hearted attempts at personal hygiene bother me. I've accepted the fact he can't keep his room clean or his clothes picked up. I don't accept him wearing the same socks for a week, or the clothes he slept in again the next day. So why is it that EVERY BLOODY DAY I have to tell him "Put on clean socks"? Why is it that he'll spend an hour in the shower, but not wash his hair? WHY is he being so, well, dainty over a simple procedure?
How much of this is just normal boy behavior? (She asks her mostly child-less friend list)
